the adult

tomorrow morning i graduate from college. today i had to pick up my grad stuff and go to a rehearsal thing. kim's fam is in town so it's been good seeing them, but i hate all the attention. naturally i try and be humble and recognition usually just embarrasses me or i have like feelings inside that just say that i'm actually inadequate and not really deserving of praise. i have a hard time even when kim says thank you for random crap i've done. doesn't mean i don't enjoy recognition some of the time. it's complicated. i didn't send out announcements, but i suppose i should send out a friendly email to friends and family out of respect to them. my mom will be there, emily has to work, the usual grovers, the usual wife, and possibly her aunt cindy. lia brought up a really good point today, saying that it must be really strange and difficult right now graduating from college and not having a strong idea about what is lying ahead. she's right as usual. i know what i want to do, i just don't know how possible it is. there are five law schools that i'm waiting on for decisions. five cities around the country that i might live in before the pools close for labor day. there is a lot of pressure on me coming from so many different directions. it sucks that we have to go through this crap. so many are at this strange turning point in life. folks are graduating, getting hitched, and procreating. one or two new years ago it all become so real.

you know what else is real? freaking armageddon is real. this world is going to hell. i figure that at the current rate we are headed, we will see a major world collapse in my lifetime. could come from the oil headache, having to do with good old prices, supply, and demand. gas and flying in planes will become a luxury. many economies of western and middle-eastern countries will collapse. this will further divide the rich from the middle-class and poor. many will die. next will be the avian flu. this will certainly an asterisk next to that years world census report when a chunk of the population dies. after a vaccine is created, for some reason the poor in third world countries don't seem to be getting theirs. the vaccine got caught up in bureaucracy and they all die. this all culminates to the main event of nuclear war. the order of the strikes and counterstrikes will be iran, u.s., china, and the u.k. and israel at the same time. france will stay out of it. and we'll all die. let's just hope that the bad korea doesn't have them by then, otherwise i don't think the brits or jews will get a chance to have their say in the matter. what's more likely is that the media is just doing a good job feeding us the fear.

tonight was the drum corp thing around the country at movie theaters. i know i made a strong push for it a few weeks ago, but i decided not to go because it said it was 180 minutes long. too long for my attention span that's for sure. i'm down with spending three hours watching the real thing in a stadium, but three hours on a screen is a little much. i'd still be there now if we had gone. i'm sure they will do it next year.

and a big thank you to big gay adam in fresno for saying on myspace the dumbest thing i've heard in weeks: "Why should I support this equality movement when I don't even have equal rights myself?" where are you living man? who thinks like this? there is some context behind this that lessens how dumb that sentence is, but still. it's a stupid sentence and a stupid idea. gracias adam.